Welcome back, you weirdo.

Sit three barstools down from my husband next Thursday at 7pm. Wear red. Order what he's drinking.

Don't speak to him. Don't look at him. Be unbelievably in his peripheral vision for forty minutes. He has a tell when he's nervous — I want to know if you trigger it. I'll be the woman at the door watching. Leave when I leave. Don't turn around on your way out.

📍London, England